


Untouchable

by Starbooks13



Category: His Dark Materials - Philip Pullman, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: 5+1 Things, Alternate Universe - Daemons, Angst, BAMF!Coulson, BAMF!Natasha, Daemons know better than humans, F/M, Implied Sexual Content, It's not all dark I swear, Loki Does What He Wants, Natasha Feels, Red Room, Steve is Amused, Tony is a troll, Trust Issues, Warning: Loki
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-30
Updated: 2013-09-30
Packaged: 2017-12-28 00:52:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 3,254
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/985694
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Starbooks13/pseuds/Starbooks13
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Or Five Times Someone Asked To Touch Natasha’s Daemon And She Said No—and One Time She Said Yes.</p><p>The Black Widow prides herself on being untouchable.  Her daemon Alexi has his doubts.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Winter Soldier

**Author's Note:**

> My first try at writing a daemon!AU, so please be gentle. The daemon names are either popular names in fandom for the character's daemon or of my own devising. Alexi's name, though, comes from Natasha's comics-canon first husband (who doesn't exist in this fic's universe).

                Natalia was sprawled on top of the Winter Soldier, her mentor, partner, and now lover, exchanging long, lazy, but heated kisses.  The room smelled of sex, sweat, and blood—the last solely his, from where Natalia had bitten his neck when she’d climaxed. 

               At the foot of the bed, her daemon, Alexi, sat perched on his black dog daemon’s belly—she didn’t know the creature’s name or what kind of dog it was, just as she didn’t know his name or where he was from.  Alexi’s eight little legs caressed the other daemon’s fur, making both she and her human growl softly. 

               Natalia sighed as she shifted to the side and curled against Winter, more than ready to sleep.  They had just successfully completed their latest mission, and they had a long flight back to Moscow in the morning.  She had nearly fallen asleep when his voice shocked her awake.  “Can I touch Alexi?”

                Natalia stiffened, eyes wide in the darkness of the bedroom, and Alexi sprung from the other daemon’s back onto the bedsheets.  “No.”  Her response was instinctive, ignoring the fact that plenty of people in the Red Room had touched her daemon.  The doctors who did the examinations handled him without care, and her former instructors had punished failure by squeezing him until they believed she had suffered enough.  She had learned quickly as a little girl that in this hell, nothing was sacred.

                For a moment, she believed she had angered him.   He was technically her superior, after all.  He had the right to touch her daemon if he wanted.  But his voice was filled with satisfaction, not anger, when he spoke again.  “Good.  I see they haven’t screwed you up too much.”  His metal hand rubbed soothing circles on her back, willing her to relax.  “Alexi is your greatest ally, but he is also your greatest weakness.”  He pressed a kiss to her hair.  “You must be untouchable, both of you, if you are to survive in this world.  Never forget that.”

                And while their affair ended with their partnership, Natalia never did.


	2. A Mark

                “Can I touch him?”

                Natalia—no, _Nadia_ for the moment—looked at her “fiancé” in shock. “No!” she blurted before she could stop herself, quickly scooping up Alexi just as her mark reached for him.

                He looked hurt and confused, his frilled lizard daemon bristling, and for a moment she wondered if she’d just ruined everything.  She’d been undercover for months now, courting a top-level nuclear scientist that her superiors wanted her to bring in.  He’d finally proposed to her the previous week, and they were making plans to have the wedding in Moscow—exactly according to plan. 

                She knew it wasn’t unusual for couples to touch each other’s daemons, but she did not love this man, did not trust him—honestly, she barely even liked him.  He was like every other man she had slept with since leaving the Winter Soldier’s bed: a mission, a target her superiors believed her specific skill set was perfect for.  She would never let him touch Alexi.  Ever.

                But he wanted to, and she saw how this could be turned to her advantage.  She quickly schooled her features into an ashamed look.  “I-I’m sorry, it’s just, I don’t feel ready yet.”  She allowed her lips to twist into a shy, coy smile, fluttering her eyelashes in a way she knew made him swoon.  “Maybe on our wedding night?”

                His response had been to move up the wedding by three months, and Natalia’s mission was completed in record time.  She jokingly thanked Alexi later, once they were back in Russia, for being so irresistible.

                Alexi snorted.  “You did all the work.”  Her daemon paused.  “It might have been nice, you know,” he murmured.  “Letting someone touch me because they loved us.”

                “He didn’t love us,” she pointed out.  “He loved who he thought we were.  It was too dangerous to let him touch you.”

                Alexi quivered, sounding distressed.  “But it’s not dangerous to let _them_ touch me.”

                Natalia picked him up and cradled him in her hands.  She and Alexi had received a physical upon their return, and he had been touched again.  Ever since that night with the Winter Soldier, they had become increasingly agitated whenever others touched Alexi.  Worse, as she grew more dangerous, the Red Room tightened its control over them.  Natalia feared what they might someday do to Alexi to insure her loyalty. 

                “Then maybe,” she whispered, stroking his back with a finger.  “We should leave.”


	3. Agent Phil Coulson

                Natalia—no, Natasha now, a new name for her new life—coughed again, the thickening smoke making her eyes water.  It was official.  She hated Budapest.

                At least she knew Barton was safe, outside the building and away from the fire.  She hoped he’d been smart enough to call for help rather than stupidly try to rescue her on his own again.  She shoved ineffectively, trying to free herself from the debris she’d been pinned under.  She heard Alexi whimpering in fear in her mind, and she couldn’t see him.  Panic spiked in her chest and she prayed to a God she’d never believed in that someone would come.

                “Romanoff!” She nearly passed out in relief—or was that smoke inhalation?—at the sound of Coulson’s voice, Thea’s bark not far behind.  She felt something pulling at the debris pinning her, and she grinned weakly at the sight of her handler’s concerned face hiding behind an oxygen mask.

                “Took you long enough, sir,” she joked, before coughing more violently.

                “Hang on. I’ll get you out of there.”  Coulson quickly helped extricate her, and Natasha catalogued her injuries.  Couple broken ribs, broken leg, sprained wrist—nothing too bad.  She wouldn’t be able to walk out of here, though.

                “Hate to break it to you, Coulson, but you’re gonna have to carry me.”  Coulson nodded and pressed an oxygen mask into her hand before moving to pick her up.  Natasha felt Alexi whimper again, and stopped Coulson, frantic.  “Wait! Alexi!”  She looked around and quickly spotted her daemon, separated from her by several flames which looked to be twice his size.  “There!” she said, pointing him out to Coulson and Thea.

                The wolfhound daemon whined and shook her head.  “I can’t get him.  I might crush him.”

                Coulson grimaced.  He glanced down at Natasha.  “If I have to pick him up, are you…okay with that?”

                In the Red Room, her handler wouldn’t have even bothered coming after her.  If he had, he certainly wouldn’t have asked before grabbing her daemon.  It was yet another reason why she had decided to trust Coulson when Barton brought her into SHIELD.  The man really cared about his assets.

                Then again, at SHIELD no one, absolutely no one, touched Alexi but her.  The doctors had been horrified at the suggestion that they handle him during her physicals when she’d first arrived, and she’d been beyond relieved.  But this was different, so instead of immediately saying no—a power she’d been delighted to have, remembering the Winter Soldier’s words—she winced.  “If you could try not to, please.”

                Coulson nodded, understanding.  Natasha pressed the oxygen mask to her face and inhaled deeply, watching as her handler moved to where Thea was trying to stamp out the fires around Alexi without stomping on him.  Pulling off his tie, Coulson held it out towards Alexi, who took the hint and quickly jumped onto the fabric, clinging tightly to it.  Coulson quickly brought Alexi back over to Natasha, and she felt a sense of wholeness when her daemon sprang into her outstretched hand.  She clutched him tightly to her chest as Coulson hefted her into his arms—he was pretty strong, for such an unassuming-looking man—and carried her out of the building, Thea leading the way.

                Much later, in Medical, Natasha looked up at her handler and smiled, perhaps the first real smile she’d ever given the man.  “Thank you,” she said softly, her voice hoarse from the smoke.  

                He simply smiled back, knowing what she really meant, and replied, “Some things need to be kept sacred, no matter the risks.”


	4. Tony Stark

                “Lighten up, Rogers! It’s the 21st century! Everyone is a lot more relaxed about things.”  

                Natasha didn’t bother glancing up from her book.  From the tiny slur in Tony’s voice and its proximity to Natasha’s place on the couch, he was both half-drunk and about to try to pull her into his latest attempt to scandalize Steve.  

                “Here, look, I’ll show you.”  Tony’s voice was directly in front of her now.  “Hey, Natasha, can I touch Alexi?”

                Natasha flicked her eyes up from her book and just looked at Tony, Fiona flitting about above his shoulder, looking as slightly intoxicated as a hummingbird can.  He immediately turned pale and retreated rapidly, Fiona flitting along with a little “peep” of fright.  “Nevermind, forget I said anything, please don’t kill me in my sleep.”

                Natasha glanced at Steve, who looked half-shocked, half-amused, though his Golden Retriever Dinah was openly laughing.  She winked at him.  He smiled back and followed a quickly departing Tony out of the room, Dinah at his heels.

                Alexi snorted.  “Please, I wouldn’t touch him with a ten-foot pole.”  Natasha allowed herself a grin as she went back to her book.  Living in Stark Tower was definitely more entertaining than she’d thought it would be.


	5. Loki

                Natasha watched Clint and Iksha from across the ballroom, highly amused.  Well, he had been complaining that their missions were getting rather repetitive.  “You always seduce the rich guy, and I always sit at my post being bored as hell while I wait for you to finish up.  Can we do something different for once?”  Now it was Natasha’s turn to watch from the shadows while Clint did all the work seducing the rich girl—though Natasha half-wished it had actually been a guy, just so she could see the look on Clint’s face.

                “He’s really not doing that bad,” Alexi commented from his perch on her shoulder.

                “No, but it’s fun to watch,” Natasha replied.  Their mark’s spoiled daughter pulled Clint onto the dance floor, and he nearly tripped over her poodle daemon  as she attempted to talk to a clearly flustered Iksha, whose feathers were all ruffled up.  Natasha' smile widened.  Put Clint in a club or a square dance and he was right at home.  Put him on a ballroom floor and he turned into Steve.  

                “They do make quite the charming couple, don’t you think?” It took every ounce of Natasha’s training not to flinch—or do something more extreme—at the sound of Loki’s voice behind her.  Alexi, though, turned around and hissed at the God of Mischief, voicing their displeasure.  Natasha could hear Loki’s raised eyebrow in his voice.  “One would think you weren’t happy to see me.”

                Natasha turned to face him, Alexi scurrying around to copy her movement. She kept her face calm for anyone who might be watching, but let Loki see the fury in her eyes.  “I’m going to get some fresh air.  Care to join me?”

                Loki smirked, an illusory snake daemon hissing from its place around his neck.  Natasha stalked past him towards the doors leading outside, repressing a shudder.  While all beings had a soul, only humans possessed daemons; Loki’s illusions gave her the creeps.

                Loki obediently followed her out into the gardens of the ostentatious hotel the mark had rented out for his daughter’s birthday bash.  Once Natasha had located a suitably remote area she rounded on him.  “Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t call SHIELD and the Avengers down on your head right now.”

                “Because your operation will be ruined and your boss won’t be too happy with you.”  Loki glanced at their surroundings, looking far too pleased with himself.  “That’s why you brought me out here, isn’t it?  So Barton can focus without any…unpleasant distractions.”

                Natasha heard the unspoken threat.  “What do you want, Loki?”

                He fixed his eyes on her again, his gaze sharp and predatory.  “I have a request to make of you, my dear.  Grant it, and I shall be on my way.”

                A request from Loki was never good news.  “What is it?”

                He looked to where Alexi still perched on her shoulder.  “May I touch your daemon?”

                Alexi gave a panicked shriek and scurried up beneath Natasha’s hair.  Natasha gaped at him in shock and disgust.  “Why the hell would you want that from me?”

                “There’s nothing I want more from the untouchable Black Widow,” Loki said, moving closer to her.  Natasha held her ground as he invaded her personal space, towering over her despite her stiletto heels.  “You outsmarted me on the Helicarrier.  It was…impressive, to say the least.  But I am the God of Lies, after all.  I can’t let such a slight to my reputation go unpunished.”  He chuckled darkly.  “And I can’t think of a sweeter revenge than the sight of you stripped bare and vulnerable before me, completely at my mercy.”

                “What, so you can destroy me?”

                “I promised your demise would be slow, intimate, in every way you fear.” The Trickster’s voice was low and seductive, as though whispering promises to a lover.  “And I will break you, little spider.  But tonight I only wish for a taste of my eventual triumph—and to let you see what your fate will be under my power.”  He tilted her chin up, bringing their faces closer together.  “Who knows?” he purred.  “You might even enjoy it.”

                “Never.” Natasha yanked a knife out from her dress and slashed Loki’s face, causing him to fling her away.  The other guests in the garden started screaming and Natasha looked up from where she had crash-landed to see a furious Loki’s daemon disappear as his tuxedo transformed into his Asgardian armor.

                She heard Alexi curse from beneath her hair and silently echoed him.  So much for keeping Loki from ruining their op.


	6. Clint Barton

                “If that bastard ever touches Alexi, I’ll kill him myself, Thor be damned.”

                Natasha smiled at Clint.  “You’d have to beat me to it.”  They lay in bed together, sated from a post-battle round of lovemaking.  Iksha perched on the headboard above their heads, her wings curled protectively around Alexi, who clung tightly to her feathered breast.

                Clint pressed a kiss to Natasha’s shoulder, tightening his grip.  “I won’t lose you, Tasha.  Not to Loki, not to anyone.”

                Natasha curled up against his chest.  “You won’t lose me.  Certainly not because of Alexi.”

                Clint shook his head.  “I know you’re careful with him, Nat, but this is Loki.  Just the thought of him touching you like that...”  Iksha made a sharp, dangerous sound and pressed Alexi even closer against herself.

                Natasha sat up, pressing her finger over Clint’s mouth.  “Then stop thinking about it.”  She certainly wanted to.  The thought was repulsive and horrific in more ways than she could count, worse than the memory of anything the Red Room had done to Alexi.  “Trust me, it will never happen.  Alexi and I would rather die.”

                Clint still seemed uneasy, so Natasha leaned down and kissed him, hard and fierce, while Alexi’s legs began moving against Iksha’s chest, stroking her feathers.  Iksha made a pleased sound and Clint relaxed beneath Natasha, returning the kiss with the same passion.  He always matched her so perfectly, their fires burning at the same rate, their daemons curling around each other as though they were one soul divided between two bodies.  It was one of the many reasons that Natasha loved him.

                She abruptly sat up again, breaking the kiss.  _Bozhe moi_.  She _loved_ him.

                Clint looked at her, startled and concerned.  “Natasha?”

                This was exactly what the Winter Soldier had warned her about.  Love was for children, and it would destroy someone like her.  Worse, it would take _him_ with her, and she couldn’t bear if that happened—

                “We love you.” Alexi said, voice full of wonder and… _joy_.  “We _love_ you.”

                Clint looked as thunderstruck as Natasha felt, a war of emotion taking place on his face.  “Tasha? Is that…?”

                Damn her daemon, but she couldn’t lie to him.  “Yes.”

                Clint yanked her back down against him, fusing their mouths together as though he wanted to devour her.  Natasha returned the kiss fervently.  But she broke away in shock when Iksha gasped out, “Oh, God, you have no idea how long we’ve been waiting, hoping…We love you too.”

                Natasha stared down at her partner, who had the decency to look somewhat sheepish.  “Clint?”

                “It’s true, Tash.”  He reached up a hand to stroke her face.

                She was pretty sure she’d stopped breathing.  “H-how long-?”

                “Since before Budapest.”

                Iksha snorted.  “More like since the moment we decided to save you.”  Clint turned bright red.

                Natasha, though, was still reeling.  “Clint, I-I don’t—I can’t-“

                Before she could blink, Alexi had flung himself from Iksha onto her head.  “No.  I won’t let you do this.  You’ve known since Loki, but you’ve been denying it.  He’s safe, Natalia.”  She flinched at the mention of her birth name.  “He won’t hurt us.”

                “Natasha,” Clint’s voice was hushed, cautious.  “I would never.  You know that.  Please.”  She felt Alexi squirm atop her head; that word in Clint’s voice never failed to make her shiver.  “Trust me.”

                “I do,” she said softly, reaching up to keep his hand pressed to her face.  “It’s just…”

                “We’re afraid,” Alexi admitted, saying what she never could.

                “Let us help you not be,” Iksha pleaded, swooping down to land next to Clint’s head on the pillow.  He reached up his free hand to stroke his daemon’s side, turning towards her.  They shared a look that, despite her years of training, Natasha could not read.  Then Clint pulled his hand from her face, taking her hand with his.  Before she could say anything, Clint placed her hand on Iksha’s head.

                Natasha and Clint both gasped, her in shock that he would let her do this, him like he’d just touched a live wire.  Iksha cooed and rubbed her head against Natasha’s palm, making Clint shudder.  He squeezed Natasha’s wrist tighter.  “Oh, God, Nat, please, touch her, touch us, touch me—“

                Natasha stroked her fingers against Iksha’s silky-soft feathers, feeling Clint writhing beneath her at every touch.  It was electric, watching him come undone as she caressed the hawk daemon, and Alexi’s whine communicated a sudden ache she felt deep in her gut.  An ache to complete the circuit, to make them truly whole, to let him in all the way at last.  Taking Alexi from her head, she held him out towards Clint’s free hand, which was clutching at the sheets.  “Clint, please…”

                Clint’s eyes went wide, but he reached for Alexi.  Natasha tensed, remembering the wrongness, the pain, of earlier such touches, but when Clint’s calloused fingertip gently stroked Alexi’s back, her head snapped back from the bolt of sheer _ecstasy_ that shot through her.  She gasped for breath, arching her back as the hand stroking Iksha began to tremble.  It was…”intense” was too tame a word to describe the feeling of her lover’s touch against her very soul.  Alexi purred happily, twitching in her palm, glorying in the touch that she had so long denied him.

                But later, much later, after humans and daemons had explored this powerful new connection in excruciatingly pleasurable detail, both the spider and her daemon would admit that waiting for the right person had been worth it.


End file.
